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February 19, 2008

Reliable Consultants v. Earle, One down, Three to go

"Between the Briefs"
By Rooks

Valentine’s Day may be over, but I have to tell y’all - the 5th circuit down in New Orleans really knows how to show a gal a good time. But more on that later . . .

Would you ever date a guy you knew had cheated on his ex? Because as comfortable as I am with so many aspects of sex, I just can’t help thinking my Momma is right on this one. Ya know, leopards don’t change their spots . . .
-Invests With Fidelity Mutual

Hmm, this is a toughie. As much as my initial instinct is to say “no, I wouldn’t”, we have to deal with a certain reality here: a not insignificant amount of people cheat.

Be more specific with my nouns, you say? Well, I can’t – I’ve done a lot of digging, and suffice it to say that data on cheating, though it seems to be everywhere, is mostly crap. Kinsey’s data (50% of men and 26% of women have cheated before the age of forty) suffers for lack of a probability sample, and it’s over a half a century old to boot. The General Social Survey (as of 2004, 21% of men and 12% of women) and books like Lust in Translation focus almost exclusively on “extramarital” sex – the data is in no way representative of the cheating habits of all Americans, just the married ones.

Now, as we all realize that the law school population is in no way representative of the real world, the best data for your question might be UVa Law’s sex survey, precisely for the reasons that make it statistically dubious elsewhere, namely that it focuses exclusively on a small, inclusive, generally nut-jobby segment of the population who all opted to attend a top law school in a college town. So, for the sake of argument (and since I don’t have Michigan stats, ahem) UVa’s data claims that roughly 30% of law students have cheated at some point in their lives, and further that the numbers were essentially the same for both men and women.

So how about a wee little hypo: Let’s say John (or Jane) Q. Law School cheated on his SO, was punished for his efforts with an uncomfortable, yet eye-opening, trip to the doctor’s office (not to mention a case of the clap no one would applaud), and has since sworn that he will never, but ever stray again. If that scenario happened when he was 14 and he’s stuck to his word, he’s probably a safe bet. If it happened last week, all bets are off.

Essentially, IWFM, as much as I’d like to think that MLaw is rife with stand up people (after all, cheating isn’t very collegial), if the UVa data is in any way representative, it would mean that nearly a third of us have, at some point in our lives, engaged in some sort of illicit extracurricular activity. It would seem illogical to write off all of these people without some context as to how and when the cheating happened; folks do, after all, make mistakes. If, however, someone has a lot of what I’ll euphemistically refer to as non-mutual relationship overlap (chronic cheating), it doesn’t exactly engender a lot of trust.

So let’s amend my answer to no, I probably wouldn’t (but there’s room to negotiate).

What the hell is a P-spot? Someone mentioned it in conversation at a bar and I had to nod along knowingly, but I have no clue what they were talking about.
-See Spot Run

The p-spot is a nickname for the prostate gland. Some folks call it the male G-spot, but that makes no sense, as G-spot is actually a just nickname for the Gräfenberg spot, which is not only a distinctly female erogenous zone, but named for the German gynecologist who discovered it, where “discovered” equals “wrote the first paper.” (Fun fact: Since Gräfenberg worked closely with an American, Robert L. Dickenson, the G-spot could have almost as easily been the D-spot. Either way, everything would still rhyme.) Regardless, you can reach the p-spot externally (by deeply massaging the perineum), or internally (trim your nails first) to provide what are apparently some very intense orgasms to a lucky fellow near you.

I wish you’d said what the conversation was about, SSR, but I’m going to hazard a guess that it likely had to do with prostate stimulation, which you can do with a sex toy like the Aneros, which you can’t buy in some states unless it’s for medical purposes, which gives me a good segue into what I want to talk about, namely the 5th Circuit’s Feb.12th 2-1 decision to overturn Texas’ ban on the sale of sex toys! Texas will likely appeal to the Supreme Court, and as the 5th Circuit relied heavily on Lawrence, it’ll be interesting to see if the Court grants cert, seeing as they denied it for the Alabama sex toy case I wrote about last October. Perhaps the nice folks of the 5th read the RG?