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December 27, 2006

Complications

David and I have been trying to keep our wedding as simple as possible: a courthouse ceremony attended by ten family members, followed by lunch at a nearby restaurant. No tuxes, no white gowns. We will be using our parents' wedding rings, which are currently in the shop being resized for us. We thought it was all set.

And then the parents swooped in. David's dad began to insist that he had to pay for everybody's lunch, even though all the other parents (including my grandparents) wanted to help out with it too. My aunt called to try to convince me to register for gifts. My mom and aunt asked if they could bring champagne and wedding cake to the restaurant, even though David and I don't drink and I don't eat sugar. And we are going to be at a restaurant -- people can order drinks and dessert if they want them! My mom flew in last night and she and my aunt informed me that we have to go to the florist today to order flowers for the "bridal party." My response: "what bridal party" -- we don't have bridesmaids or groomsmen because we are getting married at the courthouse with ten family members!

I probably sound like the world's biggest ingrate right now. After all, David and I are blessed with families who are excited about our wedding and want to help us out however they can. And I am truly grateful for their help and support. We discussed eloping, but I wanted our families involved because I wanted to feel as though we had their blessing to enter this phase of our relationship. I'm overjoyed that so many people are going to be able to come to the courthouse with us, and I'm glad for all the help we are getting: David's dad with the lunch and my mom and aunt with the flowers. My cousin is designing the announcements and I'm thrilled to have such talented family members who are willing to share their skills. At the same time, however, I think weddings are one of those "less is more" occasions: the fewer people, the more we can interact with each one; the fewer details to worry about, the more relaxed we will be about the whole thing; the less we focus on the wedding, the more attention we can give to the marriage itself.

Posted by eklanche at December 27, 2006 09:26 AM

Comments

Congratulations! I hope it was a very memorable day for you.

I sympathize with the complications. We had a rather sudden court ceremony about 6 months before our big church wedding/party. We wanted it to be very low key -- just the 2 of us in jeans. However, our mothers got wind of it and had to "help." We resisted guests, but I did have to wear a white sweater and carry a bouquet just to please my mom. I felt like an idiot, but it didn't take away from the occasion. We thought it would be a very casual 5 minutes in court, but we were both really moved by the experience. The vows are all that really matters in the end.

Anyhow, I'm extremely happy for you both!!!!!

Posted by: jpstamat at January 3, 2007 06:41 PM

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