jakorte's blog

So, a near accident started me thinking. (See Humor: That's Random: No Brakes!)

Whenever I would say to Jeff, “I’ve been thinking, and…� He would roll his eyes in an exaggerated expression of fear, and say, “Oh, no, here we go!� It was a funny little joke between us because sometimes I can come up with some really bizarre theories about things. (Reference: Humor: That's Random: Linguistic Obesity)

So, here I am trying to reduce my heart rate after a traffic incident, and Linda’s making me laugh by mock-yelling, “Everyone look out! No Brakes!� Once the continued ride home settled down a bit, I start thinking about what could happen if I committed to living my life that way. “No Brakes!�

There’s a song that I have been listening to over and over lately that really says what I’ve been struggling with. From Casting Crowns, the lyrics are “Just how close can I get, Lord, to my surrender, without losing all control?�

I know that answer to this one is “not very close.� Surrendering means loss of all control, and then continued, constant recognition of that loss. I realize that I’d have to choose “No Brakes!� to get to where I want to be spiritually; to move me from this place, to a deeper one in my heart and soul.

This leads me to another great song, “Look Heart, No Hands.� recorded by Randy Travis. It’s a song that I’ve known for years and have loved since the first time I heard it. Only now it has a brand new meaning for me in the context of having a child-like trust in God.

“I remember how it used to feel
Ridin' down ol' two mile hill
Tennis shoes up on the handlebars
Payin' no mind to the passin' cars
No doubts, no fears
Just like when you are here.
No chains, no strings
No fences, no walls
No net, just you
To catch me when I fall
Look heart, no hands.�

So, the way I see it, trusting God enough to take your hands off the handle bars, and putting your foot flat on the floor away from the brakes in your life are the same idea.

Ok, so I had the moment of clarity. But, I’m still on the crest of the hill trying to decide if I’m going to let loose and fly down it, or continue to hold on to my ever-present fear of losing all control.

jak