jakorte's blog

I should have stayed where I was
Then it wouldn’t have hurt so much
To look back on what I thought was ok.

I couldn’t find
what I was looking for yesterday
an invitation – with a date
I thought I had more time
But as usual, I was late.
I guess I should be glad
That I was spared that other pain
The one that comes back
After I put in so much effort
To make it seem
Like it’s gone away.

It’s so hard to be happy sometimes
It’s so hard to cage my jealous heart
There are reasons I did not get
what I asked for,
and I know what they are
and I know it was all for the better
but when you took away that half
a lot of what was left was bitter
and that’s been my aftermath.

So, is this what I wanted
To make it easier to leave
When the time comes
I thought I was too tired to start over
But I’m too disappointed to stay here, too
It’s coming time to leave again
I know that’s what I’ll do.
I know I’m headed for the road again
It’s just a matter of time.
I won’t bother looking for another you
Because that’s something I know
I’ll never find.

jak