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August 05, 2008

Someone Else's Voice

Early Wednesday evening, I learned two things. First, our GITC team was going to be split up. Secondly, the two teams were going to be performing totally different tasks. Team One would be involved in mold remediation at a home. Team Two would be canvassing neighborhoods affected by the floods, searching for people in need of assistance.

The term used to describe the second team was “Spiritual Care." I felt very strongly that I would like to be part of that team. Mold remediation seemed a bit daunting, and yes, I was still a little afraid of the youth factor. In any unusual move for me, I made sure to mention my preference for Spiritual Care.

After dinner, our hyper-tired, hyper-excited team gathered for briefing. Seated in pews, the formal plans for our teams were revealed. I was immediately disappointed not find myself placed on the Spiritual Care team. I was doubly surprised a little while later to be asked if I would be willing to be the Safety Lead at the home site.

As my brain screamed, “No!" another voice, astonishing not my own in heart, or my own in timbre, confidently, loudly, deeply, and definitively responded: “Yes." Even as I heard the echo of that very committed “Yes" bounce back at me from the walls of the sparsely filled sanctuary, I wondered where it came from. For several long minutes, I considered taking it back. But I’m timid about retracting commitments, especially ones so solidly given. I lamely offered that I didn’t know the requirements of the position. I was told that the person who held this task on the last Wisconsin team could brief me more thoroughly. What I was really feeling was inadequacy that my limited experience wasn’t nearly deep enough for me to be entrusted with the complete safety of the team.

jak

Posted by jaselin at August 5, 2008 01:16 PM

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