jakorte's blog

Did you ever have the feeling that your life would be easier if you didn’t have one?
I mean one not full of obligations and chores and others’ expectations?

Asking me to predict how I am going to feel at any time or regarding any matter (emotionally or physically) is completely pointless. I don’t know how I’m going to feel one minute from now. Trust me; it’ll be just as much a surprise to me as it will be to you.

In my current state-of-mind, I’ve become a bit skeptical of the appropriateness of the saying, “GOD never gives us more than we can handle.” I swear, sometimes it’s like my name is on the list twice, or three times. Maybe that’s because women change their names when they marry, or maybe it’s because I chose another name for myself for a decade and a few more years. Makes sense, doesn’t it? There must be some sort of heavenly clerical bookkeeping programming error. I can’t think of any other reason why it seems I’m continual heaped upon.

Fair warning: cranky-meter is registering a solid 10. So, don’t even consider starting in on me with that “stress builds character” nonsense. If that’s the case, than I’m a freakin’ skyscraper of character: built up to top-heavy near toppling-over proportions. With that in mind, there is something to be said for keeping everything in proportion. So, perhaps, in a few days, when surgery is complete and I’m resting (hopefully obliviously), I’ll be better able to consider thinking about how I might be thinking about feeling… someday. I have a feeling though, that’s not what I’m going to be thinking. Anybody have any thoughts on this?