April 29, 2013
Lessons Learned: A Memorial, ME Newsletter Vol. 6, Issue 18
Feeling the loss of a wonderful person and mentor, and the pain that goes along with it. For those of you who knew her, and those of you who didn’t, the following are my snapshot memories, which I am gladly sharing with you.
It seemed Chris didn’t particularly like having her picture taken. Most of the time, her hands, or her clipboard, or her hair purposefully got in the way. I don’t know why. She was a beautiful woman with an amazing smile. Somewhere, though, I do have one picture. She couldn’t avoid it, since her hands were full carrying a music themed thirtieth birthday cake. I’m sure I could find it in one of many boxes of memories, but I really don’t need to. It’s vivid memory, even without it.
Lessons learned: a picture you may not want taken now, may be a comfort in years to come, and black icing creates black tongues and black lips and lots of laughter.
I very much admired Chris’ ability to not let anyone ruffle her feathers, no matter how hard they tried. In my thirties, it was an unfathomable mystery. Heading into fifty, I well understand it now. I shake my head at the thirty-somethings I know - boiling over, letting off steam, jet-propelling right past an easy solution. I am glad to have such a peacefully, dedicated spirit to emulate.
Lessons learned: be the best example you can even if you’re not getting through to anyone; someday it will catch up to someone and they will finally see the wisdom in it.
A few days before an Asylum staff white- elephant holiday exchange, Chris showed me some canisters she was planning to get rid of. We decided that she would bring them to the event. We were pretty sure that no one else would want them as much I did. They matched the ridiculous chicken border in my kitchen. I’m not 100% sure who I traded a bottle of wine for the chickens. I do remember it was a very fun trade. I still have those chicken canisters. I've thought of her every time I've packed and unpacked them, and sometimes when they’ve unexpectedly caught my eye from their top shelf perch. I really wish I'd told her that they, and she, have stayed with me for all these years.
Lessons learned: Only a true friend would see the value of making someone happy with something no one else would want, and if you’re the recipient of such a treasured gift, you should never stop saying, “Thank you.”
My favorite Chris moment of all occurred in the tiny Asylum Records kitchen one morning. After putting my lunch away, my head came up from behind the refrigerator door to see Chris standing there with an empty coffee cup and a silly grin. She nudged up next to me, and whispered conspiratorially, “I just wanted you to know that Kyle and I are seeing each other… just in case you come around the corner too fast someday and catch us kissing.”
Lessons learned: it’s not always easy to deal with a fast-moving New Yorker, and most importantly of all… when love makes you glow, you should let everybody know.
May your happiest memories carry you through.
With fond regards,
Posted by jaselin at April 29, 2013 02:24 PM