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July 09, 2006

Detroit sports...

I'm now having weekly strokes due to what's going on with my pro sports teams in Detroit. The Tigers are on top!?!? Don't get me wrong, I'm very excited to see the Tigers competitive and with the best record in the league. It takes me back to when they used to have yearly battles with the Blue Jays for the last playoff spot (Post-1987, pre-1994). But I was getting so used to the Tigers sucking it up, I don't know what to make of this new brand of Tigers team. I think I can feel a vein explode, both from excitement and disbelief, in my brain everytime they say on SportsCenter that the Tigers are in first!

Next cause of brain spasms, Stevie retiring. We all new it was going to happen. But if it had happened 3 years ago, like it probably should have, I wouldn't have this feeling like he was robo-Stevie and was just going to keep coming back until he died. And if he died, he probably would have found a way to remain the captain and take at least one draw from center. I feel honored to have seen him play (and to have almost stepped on one of his kids), but it's hard to think of next season without him.

So, Stevie retires, that's enough right... no. Then Ben Wallace decides he's had enough of the Pistons and goes to Chicago. I'm not mad he went to one of the Pistons' rivals teams, I'm just mad he left at all. He was the face, the personality, the defense, and the hair of the Pistons for the entirety of their recent upswing. I won't be able to watrch when the Pistons play the Bulls, it'll just be depressing to see Ben in a different jersey.

OK, two major stars in Detroit sports have left us. Can we stop that now? Oh wait, NO! Christ. Today I read this. Are you kidding me!? He went to a team that was offering him less money than the Redwings. The team that's been his for years, the team that got his name etched on the Stanley Cup, the team that he would now be sole captain of, he just left it!?

So, what's going to be next? At least it's just the pro teams. If something major kept happening to my Wolverines, I might actually be in the hospital (so, what, I'm overdramatic).

So, my predictions as to what might happen next to break the hearts of Detroit sports fans...

1. Barry Sanders comes out of retirement and signs with Green Bay only to help them win a Super Bowl.
2. Joey Harrington leads Miami to a Super Bowl championship.
3. Chauncey, RIP, and Tayshaun all buy out their own contracts and follow Ben to Chicago.
4. There's a clubhouse brawl between Kenny Rogers, Pudge, Carols Guillen, and Maggio Ordonez and they all decide to leave the Tigers.
5. Mike Illitch picks up the Redwings and moves them to Cleveland.

2006, a weird year for Detroit sports.

Posted by mldarby at July 9, 2006 01:56 PM


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